Bitch Made Men

Let me start by saying - There's nothing worse than a Bitch Made Man.
I'm sorry, it's harsh, but it's true. Women don't like it and men don't respect it.

Most of these men really never admit to themselves that they are in the "bitch made" category, it's a hard pill to swallow. Most of the soft ass dudes I've come across spend so much time trying to hide their bitchiness that they don't fool anyone but themselves.

I'd like to explore what I think constitutes this unfortunate disorder and whether or not there is a cure.

First let me say that you don't have to be made of steel to be an upstanding guy. You just have to know what you stand for. Be firm but fair, never let anyone run over you, but also don't take advantage of others. Too much of a hard ass is just a douche bag. No one wants to be with a completely cold emotionless bastard.

You don't have to be the type to throw down, but personally, I need to know you can. Also, don't be afraid to check your woman. I don't mean chin-check her ass, but it's Ok to wear the pants and put your foot down at times. I know that I don't like to be with a dude I can walk all over. It's boring. Plus, if you can't check ME - who CAN you check?? I'm not about to have you hiding behind me if some real shit goes down.

Next thing is emotions. It's Ok to be emotional, just don't be feminine. Men don't cry. Sorry, that might be old skool, sexist, whatever you wanna call it, but in my book, unless someone dies - suck it up man. You need to be my shoulder to cry on. That's why you have testicles and I don't, remember?

Now keep in mind that doesn't mean you can't show emotion. You can get upset, or mad, or hurt just like us. Just choose to verbalize it with passion instead of whining. A good woman will recognize when she needs to be strong for you - and she'll do it without ever saying a word. A good woman will be that back bone and that glue that keeps a relationship together. She will always have a back up plan and an "I told you so" for when you fuck up, but she'll still let you be the man and fuck up in the first place.

There's some other key points for me as well:

If you're a hypocrite, that's automatic Bitch Made. A real man will admit to his mistakes and show his steps to change them rather than just say one thing and do another. Be a man of your word because at the end of the day, if you don't have that, you don't have anything anyway.

If you snitch in any way - Bitch Made. Don't throw you're homies under the bus to the cops, their girl, nothin'. Even if they stab you in the back, don't break that code. If you do, you're only disrespecting yourself.

If you wear skinny jeans - Bitch Made!! Sorry, I had to throw this one in. If you borrow pants from your little sister you do not have enough testosterone in your system. Unless we are about to get busy, I don't ever wanna see your knee caps or ball sack.


If you talk a lot but never say nothin' - Bitch Made. Don't speak on an issue unless you are educated enough about the subject to take a stance. Make sure when you open your mouth there is something of substance coming out. You never know who might be listening.

Now that that's all out on the table, I can't stress enough a few things that a REAL MAN does. Don't ever get it twisted for Bitch Made:

Love your woman. Keep her a priority in your crazy life. Make sure she gets the affection and the attention she needs to be fullfilled. A little bit goes a long way. You will be amazed at what a well taken care of woman will do for you. Hold her when she needs it. Kiss her everyday. Tell her you love her. Be her best friend, not just the man that messes up her house and gets her pussy. Listen to her when she talks and validate her feelings.
I promise you it will pay off.

Choose your battles. Don't knock out the dude at the next gas pump because you don't like how he looked at you. Don't flip a nutty on your chick because she said or did something you don't like. Don't act a fool in court because you know your charges are bullshit.

Just because you have the power to fuck shit up doesn't mean you should. Assess the situation and decide how important it is to prove your point. Sometimes you have to be man enough to let it go.

Don't be afraid to reach out. Even the toughest muthafucka in the world needs a hand from time to time. Stay humble. It's Ok to receive help from people close to you. Don't act like the world is against you. If you think you're too good or "too much of a man" to accept an act of love or good will from the right person, you may end up alienating the ones who really matter. Be appreciative and grateful that God put friends or family or a woman in your life to have your back.

As for a cure, I would say if there is one, the first step would be honesty. Take an honest look at yourself and strive to stay true to that. You don't have to be the hardest, richest, hottest or the best at anything in particular. Stop trying to impress everyone and just be you. People always respect it and if they don't then it's because they themselves lack substance. You know the saying...Real Recogize Real. It's true.

So if you feel you might need to man the fuck up - do yourself and the world a favor. Go watch some porn. Go drink a beer. Go to the gun range or a boxing match or something. Put on your "big boy britches" and own your own destiny. Don't be a Bitch Made Muthafucka.

A real man is a diamond in the rough, a true gem. A man with values, beliefs and back bone is priceless and rare. If you are one: don't let this world change you. If you find one: cherish him and hold on to him with both hands.

*special thanks for inspiring this topic goes to @wmburden who is definitely not Bitch Made.