Tuesday, April 20, 2010

What Men Need To Know To be Better Liars

Today let's talk about LYING. We all do it. If you say you NEVER lie...THATS a straight up LIE. It really don't matter how small or big - a lie is a lie is a lie. So now that we're all done judging each other, let's look at the reasons behind why men lie.

He doesn't want to hurt you
Maaaybe sometimes, just sometimes, your man will tell a lie because the truth looks bad, but was nothing, and he doesn't want to hurt you. More likely than this, however, is the next explanation...

He doesn't want to deal with your reaction
I would think this is probably the most common reason men tell lies. C'mon ladies, admit it...we tend to over analyze EVERYTHING. We are going to take the truth, then blow it completely out of proportion, then hang it over his head. Forever.

In our defense though, I would like to say that this is definitely NOT always the case. Sometimes our reaction is completely within logic and reason. Y'all really do some stupid shit.

He's a complete asshole
This is also a reason men lie. Some men are just dirty dogs. You know, the kind that will introduce you to a girl and tell you it's his cousin only to find out later that he was so boning her. The kind that tells you his "homegirl" is a lesbian just so you don't suspect anything. The kind that would steal from his own mother or tell you he's dying to get some sympathy pussy. The type that just has no regard for you as a woman. This is the only liar that's dangerous to forgive.

Sometimes I don't think men even realize the damage they cause to a relationship by lying. Maybe they don't realize that depending on the size or quantity of lies, it makes you start to question EVERYTHING they say. They hate to be investigated, but most of the time they bring it upon themselves by breaking the most important thing two people share: Trust.

Men need to realize that women tend to blame things on themselves. Sometimes if they're lied to, even if they don't admit it, they find a way to make it their fault. Especially in the case of cheating.

It also hurts to the core in a serious relationship. If you feel as though your man is your world, and your best friend, when you find out he has lied about something you start to think he doesn't feel the same about you. How could he just lie like that if he did? It leads to break downs in communication which leads to arguing, potential snooping, nagging, accusations, less or worse sex, etc. Get the picture?? All bad for you.

So - if you're NOT cheating - get your lying game together!!! I'm not promoting dishonesty, but if you're going to lie you liar - do it right.

First of all. Stop lying about stupid shit. Don't tell your woman you're going to the regular club when you're really going to the strip club. DUMB!! Even if she's the uptight type that don't go for that sort of thing, just be honest. Instead, break it down to her. Explain that the strip joint is the LAST place she needs to worry about your ass at. The danger is at the regular club! Or dang, invite her. Get her on your side and you won't have to lie.

Next, stop being so dumb. Clean up your evidence. You know why women rarely get caught doing anything?? We cover our tracks, duh.
Plus, women leave clues for other women that men never even see or think about...until it's too late. When I first met my boyfriend I made sure my hair was left all over his couch, bed, carpet and bathroom so that if he was lying and he DID have someone in his life, she would know I'd been there. I also visually scoured his apartment for any signs of a woman, including under the sink, the type of pictures and artwork that he had displayed, house hold products, movie collection, etc.
If you want to lie to a woman - think like one.

Don't forget to decide what's worth lying about. Most men just spout lies about anything. The first second they start to feel heat from their lady...here comes "See what had happened was..." Choose your fibs more carefully, that way, if you do get caught, the fact that you are mostly honest with her will count for a lot in getting you off the hook.

And lastly, the obvious: If a man don't have his word, he has nothing. I know some people would disagree with me, but that's especially true in a relationship. It won't grow without trust. In fact, it will regress. A relationship without trust is an immature and exhausting one.

A good woman can overlook some imperfections. She can see past your flaws to believe in your highest potential. Don't ruin that because you're a bad liar.

**Special thanks to @DaniellaR88 for inspiring this post. She might be more careful what she "inspires" next time! #skreefasquad

1 comment:

  1. Best quote I've ever had the pleasure of using: “Please don't lie to me, unless you're absolutely sure I'll never find out the truth.” -- Ashleigh Brilliant